Unplanned pregnancies are extremely common. Yet, no matter your confusion or surprise of a positive pregnancy test result, you neither label your baby as a “mistake” nor “accident.”
Expecting when you don’t feel ready to become a mother or have no interest in adding to your current family can create stress, frustration and fear about the future – not just for you, but also for your baby. However, even if the thought of allowing someone else to raise your child seems unconscionable, the concept may be worth consideration.
What questions can help you decide?
Prospective birth mothers who are young and single, for example, commonly sense inadequacy in what they feel they could provide. Meanwhile, home and financial stability often represent opportunities for children to grow and develop within a strong support system.
There is a natural sense of loss that often accompanies the selfless decision to place a child for adoption. Yet, considerations that could prepare you to move forward with that choice might include:
- Do you feel a connection to your baby?
- Will your friends and family support your choice?
- Can you afford the financial responsibility associated with raising a child?
- Are you mentally prepared for parenting?
- Is your pregnancy a matter you’d like to keep secret?
Your unique situation will help you determine what’s right for you. Ultimately, the decision to place a child is unique for every mother who’s struggled with her choice.
Find the solution you prefer
Depending on your circumstances, you might want to select the family you feel would be the best fit for raising your child. Adherence to ethnic practices or religious principles may guide your thoughts. Or, perhaps the level of future involvement in your child’s life is of utmost importance.
The adoption process requires the help of licensed professionals to oversee the legal and ethical concerns of all involved. And regardless of why you choose to relinquish parental rights, you have a say in the process.
No matter what another birth mother’s story might suggest, the potential guilt you feel or opinions of those close to you, your greatest expression of love is found in doing what you believe is best for your child.